Sara Bareilles is a Jerk

Hey Sara! How are you doing? Good, good. Listen, can I talk to you for just a second? It's about us, I- well, I feel this relationship has gotten a little one-sided. I'm really putting myself out there for you, and I just feel like there's no reciprocation. I'm not asking for much, I know you've got your music career and that's a big, big responsibility, I understand that. But, take last week for example, when I rented out that movie theater to surprise you with "10 Things I Hate About You"? That's your favorite movie. You left halfway through because you didn't like the popcorn, and you didn't even say thanks or anything. Heath Ledger hadn't even serenaded her from the bleachers yet. It's really expensive to rent out a movie theater, you know. But I did it because I love you, you're worth it. And last month, the whole thing with the dinner I made. You went out to get a bottle of wine and came back with Burger King, that's just a big slap in the face to me. But that's the past. I'm not that upset, you did what you did, and I know you do love me, even when you don't say it. But do you think that maybe you could show me a little more? Oh, just anything. Could you write a little song for us or something? Nothing like a single for the radio or anything, just a little ditty for us, that'd be nice.

...1 week later...

I’m not gonna write you a love song
’cause you asked for it
’cause you need one, you see